Aarohi's Pov:

As soon as I stepped into my room, the air felt different—stale, heavy, almost suffocating.Maa sa's words still echoed in my head, each one sharper than the last. It was strange how something as simple as a few sentences could hurt more than any wound. I could still feel the weight of her voice, the anger behind it, pressing against my chest.

My fingers trembled slightly as I shut the door behind me, the soft click sounding louder than it should have. For a second, I just stood there—frozen—staring at nothing. My body was stiff, every muscle tight, as if it still expected another blow of words to land. My throat burned, but I refused to let the tears fall. What was the point? No one was here to hold me, to tell me it was okay. Crying would only make the emptiness louder.

I ran a hand through my hair, trying to steady my breath, but even that felt like too much effort. The silence of the room was deafening—no voices, no comfort, just the faint hum of the ceiling fan spinning above me. My eyes wandered around, landing on the unmade bed, the open book I’d left on the table this morning. Everything looked the same, yet nothing felt familiar.

I wanted to scream, or maybe just sink into the floor and disappear. But instead, I walked to my bed and sat down slowly, the mattress sinking under my weight. My palms were cold, my heart still pounding. I pressed them together tightly, as if holding myself together piece by piece.

I took a deep breath, forcing the tears back once more. I had already learned that crying never changed anything—it only reminded me that no one would come to stop me. So I sat there in silence, staring at the wall, pretending that the ache in my chest didn’t exist.

After seating there what felt like decade..I suddenly heard a voice making me flinch...

Who is shouting like this??(I thought)..

I went to the direction from where the voice was coming...

Oh it's from the living room but who's there??

I went further and saw a man standing!!!

Oh it's guruji....

He's here....

Ofcourse he is that's why he's calling you na 🤦🏻‍♀️...

Guruji: Aarohi beta kha ho tum hum kbse tumhe bula rahe han ...

Aarohi:ji huh! Kya kha kbse😧..

Guruji: Hnji baccha! Kbse par ap koi jawab hi nhi de rhi thi ...

Aarohi (thought): kya kare guruji humare andar ki awazen itni tezz thi ki apki bhar ki awaz sunai hi ni di...

Guruji: Phir kin khayalon mai kho gyi baccha aaiye jldi phle hi late han aaj hum...

Aarohi: ji--ji aayi guruji!

After that without any delay I went back to my room grabbed my stuff

— and ran to the living room as I didn't wanted guruji to wait  for me any longer...

I reached there and greeted him— a warm good morning and he too reciprocated with the same  warmth ...

Then I bent down to touch his feet, my heart steady yet full of emotion. The moment my forehead touched the floor, a quiet calm spread through me...

When his hand rested lightly on my head, it felt like all the noise inside me faded for a while.

I looked up, and Guruji’s gentle smile met my eyes — silent, understanding, and kind. I folded my hands once more, whispering a soft “pranam.” For a brief moment, everything felt lighter, as if his blessing had lifted something I didn’t even know I was carrying.

Then we started with studies...

Ahhh my books..I loved them always ..

not flexing! But I am a quit good student – guruji loves me,and its all because of my love for my books —my best friends🫶🏻...

We studied for like really long hours and by the time we finished..

the evening was already slipping in, draping the room in a soft golden hush. I closed my books, my mind still buzzing with the day’s lessons. When Guruji rose to leave, I stood up quickly and bent to take his blessings. His kind eyes met mine for a moment, and with a faint smile, he nodded before walking out.

As the sound of his footsteps faded down the corridor, a strange stillness filled the room. I let out a quiet breath I didn’t realize I was holding. My body felt heavy, every thought slowed. Without a second thought, I sank into the sofa, the cushions sighing beneath me. For a moment, I just sat there — tired, blank, and oddly calm — letting the silence breathe around me.

After that I called her—the only person in this haveli who truly loves me, who gave me the love I was craving from Maa sa ..

Kaveri kaki— she's in our haveli since 20 years now,she's more like a family than a house help ..

I love her so much, She's the only one I could look up to when I needed someone emotionally....

Kaveri kakiiiiiiii........(I called up)

my voice echoing softly through the long, marbled corridor...

Within seconds, hurried footsteps followed, breaking the silence of the mansion. Kaki came running from the kitchen, her saree pleats slightly loosened, and a faint shimmer of sweat glistened on her temple. The golden bangles on her wrists clinked as she steadied herself, her breath heavy yet respectful.

She bowed her head slightly, her pallu drawn neatly over it, eyes filled with a mixture of worry and devotion. “Ji, Rajkumari bitiya?” she spoke, her tone trembling with both care and caution.

The faint aroma of spices clung to her as if she had just stepped away from a storm of boiling pots and sizzling pans. Even in her haste, she maintained the dignity..

Kaki hume bhook lagi hai khana de dijiye! I said more like a child throwing tantrums in front of her mother, a smile tugged on her lips.. she just hummed,bowed her head and stepped towards the kitchen once again,her anklets making soft sounds which somehow sooths the ache inside me ....

From outside the kitchen.I could hear the faint clinking of utensils and the comforting sound of something sizzling in ghee. The smell drifted out soon after — warm, familiar, and homely — making my stomach grumble in anticipation.

When she finally returned, she was carrying a tray filled with all my favorite dishes. I couldn’t help but smile. “Apko hamesha pata hota hai hume kya chahiye,” I said, my voice lighter now.

She placed the tray in front of me with that gentle smile of hers. I didn’t wait for another word — the first bite felt like comfort itself. The dal, the soft rotis, the sabzi — everything tasted like care. A tired laugh slipped out of me as I continued eating, feeling the day’s exhaustion slowly fade into the background.

For the first time that evening, I felt at peace — warm, full, and quietly content.

Till I finished last bite of my meal,I was totally full—both my stomach as well as my heart, every dish she made was just so comforting and homely..I was totally overwhelmed by the flavours by now,then I washed my hands and thanked kaki for such amazing food...

Her face instantly lit up hearing the appriciation as if she had won some war..She's really cute (thought I) a smile crept on my lips for the first time that day, a genuine one...

After that I greeted her good night and went to my room —only place I belong to in this haveli,my footsteps echoing on the cold marble floor,my anklets making soft jingle sound...

As soon as I entered my room, a sharp memory of the morning flashed across my mind - the argument with Maa sa. I could still hear the harshness in her voice, but I pushed it aside, unwilling to let the tension linger. Needing a fresh start, I headed straight for the shower, letting warm water wash away the day's heaviness.

Afterwards, I changed into my simple kurti and palazzo, something comfortable yet calming.

So now as I'm all done with my chores,I decided to finish off the last task of the day —my favourite one ,that is writing my daily dairy where I pour my heart out about the happenings of the day ,so I went to my study desk and opened my daily dairy....

Now,sitting by my desk, the quiet of my room surrounded me as I prepare to write my daily diary -a refuge from the noise of the day.

Everyone find there home in a person but for me it's always been my dairy-- my solace, my home...

It never judged me -- not  with my flaws, not with my insecurities or my clumsiness...

It's the only place where I be myself not having the pressure to be judged or scolded....

Dear Dairy...

Aaj phir maa sa ne mujhe daanta 🥺.. Mujhe iss baat ka dhuk nhi hai ki unhone mujhe danta par iss baat ka dhuk hamesha se hai ki main vo beti nhi ban payi jo vo chahti han.. Shayad galti khi na kahi meri hi hogi,shayad mujhe hi acchi beti ya jaisa vo kehti han ek acchi rajkumari ban na nhi aaya ..

Par mujhe kabhi samajh nhi aaya ki kaise banu mai ek acchi rajkumari.. aakhir aisa kya karu main jisse maa sa khush ho jaye..

Main toh unki khi har baat maan ne ki pori koshish karti hu..jo bhi vo kehti han bina shikayat sun leti hu .. unhone kbhi mujhe Mahal se bahar ni jane diya yaha tak ki Mahal mai bhi pori tarah nhi ghumne diya,kbhi bhar nhi leke gye,sbhi bacchon ke maa baap unhen bhar ghumane le jate han par hum kabhi ni gye,humne tb bhi kuchh nhi kaha..jb bhi maa sa aur baba sa bhar jate han aur humen akela chod jate han hum tb bhi chup rahe ...

Aaj bhi toh humne bs aam bacchon ki tarah college jakar padhne ki baat hi ki thi na itni si baat par itna daant diya unhone hume🥺.. ye tak keh diya ki hum kisi kaam ke nhi hai...kya hum itne bure han ki unhen sharam aati hai duniya ko ye batane mai ki hum unki beti han..

Ye rakhsa toh sirf ek bahana hai baki rajaon ke bhi bacche han vo bhi toh bhar ghumate hai sach toh ye hai shyd ki hum iss layak hi ni hai ki duniya ko pta chle ki hum Uday Rajvansh ki beti han....

Kya shyd agar hum ladke hote toh maa sa aur baba sa humse alag tarah se pesh aate... Unhone humse kaha bhi tha ek baar ki unhen hamesha se ladka chaiye tha par phir hum ho gaye..kya yhi wajah hai unki nafrat ki..kya ladki hona itna bada gunah hai ...

Hn shyd yhi wajah hogi agar hum ladke hote toh baba sa ke vansh ko aage le jate,unki rajgaddi par baith te,tb unhen humari raksha bhi nhi karni padti.. tb hum itne useless nhi hote shyd ....

Filhal toh hum bs ek sharp ban ke reh gye han vo bhi ek "Lucky Curse"... Jo duniya ki nazaron mai toh har ash-o- aaram se ghira hua hai kyu—kyuki vo Lucky hai par kisi ko ye nhi pta ki ye Luck hi humara sbse bda shrap hai.....

Bs aasha hai koi din aisa aaye jb hum bhi kisi ki zindagi ka "Lucky Curse" nhi balki unka "Lucky Charm" ho...

Bye Dear Dairy..🙋🏻‍♀️

With that, I closed my diary, its last page now holding the weight of a day I wished to forget. The words I’d written still shimmered faintly under the lamplight—raw, restless, and honest. For a moment, my eyes lingered on them, as if hoping they would take away the ache I carried inside. But no, pain never leaves that easily.

I placed the diary on my bedside, carefully sliding the pen beside it, as though sealing away the storm that had raged between me and Maa Sa. The fight replayed faintly in the corners of my mind, but I pushed it aside—tonight, I wanted peace, even if it was borrowed.

Pulling the soft quilt over myself, I turned to my side, staring at the moonlight spilling gently across the curtains. Its calmness soothed something within me. Slowly, my breathing steadied, and with one last thought—perhaps tomorrow will be gen

tler—my eyes fluttered shut, surrendering to sleep’s quiet embrace.

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